I have invested a lot of time and energy in the recent months in the tools that we commonly refer to as Social Networking.
I have written articles and joined groups on Helium.com.
I have a found a good number of old and recent friends on Facebook.com.
I have a number of professional contacts that I have worked with over the last twenty years on LinkedIn.com.
And recently I even started using Twitter.com. I even have some followers.
And on a day like today, when I have a little time on my hands, I like to go to all these websites and see what's happening.
But do I really get to interact with these people?
Virtually … no.
Have I made any new friends because of it?
Sadly no.
Oh, there is the odd chat session, or I get to look at someone's photo album. Some memories are shared, and some jokes are typed.
But all in all this whole social networking set of applications leaves me feeling unsatisfied. Empty.
It's missing something. Personal contact. A pat on the back. A punch in the arm. The look in someone's eye when you make them laugh, or pay them a compliment, or teach them something, or learn something from them.
The bonding.
Yes, on LinkedIn, my set of 15 connections extends my social network to a group of people numbering over twenty four hundred. But none of those additional twenty four hundred people know my name. Doors will not open up to me because down some long linked line of people who know people who know people. But is that what I am looking for? For doors to open up? For career opportunities to avail themselves to me?
I don't think that's why I am here? I have a career, a good job with a good company. A company I do not plan to leave until I can retire.
So I sit and consider why I am so interested in these social networking internet applications. And the only reason that I have is because I design software applications and systems for a living. I am passionate about what I do. And these new concepts interest me greatly. The thought put into the potential synergies that could arise – and the safeguards put in place and the requirements that must have driven the design of such sites.
Although I still don't see the advantage of Twitter. The usefulness of Twitter so far eludes me. Yet I tweet away.
There have been only a few social networks that I truly find satisfying. They are not virtual, they are real.
The sailing club Darlene and I belonged to, where sailors could sit around in the clubhouse or on each others boats and talk – about life in general, with the commonality that we all love sailing.
The ball teams that I have played on where after a hard fought game we sit together and talk – about like in general with the commonality that we all love playing ball and we are a team.
The offices I have worked in over the course of my professional life, where in moments of calm we gather together and talk – about life in general and the direction our business is going with the commonality of the role that we play together as a team to enhance our business position.
And any time members of my family get together. My family, my in-laws (yes, even my in-laws), my cousins and niece and nephew.
These are the places where friends are made. These are the environments that give us a commonality – that create the bonds that are missing from the virtual social networking sites of the internet. These are the places where we learn to appreciate each other for our unique skills, for our distinct personalities and for our common values, goals and objectives.
The "We are in this together" bond.
We learned this in our youth in the schools we attended, the teams we played on, the clubs we belonged to, the common hopes and aspirations we were just starting to realize.
Yet, here I sit on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, with my kids splashing in the pool, and my lovely wife Darlene out shopping and running around doing the errands that make our home a paradise. I sit here and devote my attention to LinkedIn or Facebook. To Twitter and to the various blogs I both read and write about sports, Information Technology, friends and family.
I sit and contemplate this while my real friends and family are here – with me now – and they will not be forever. Because time brings change to everything. My daughters will grow up and marry and move away. My circle of friends will likely shift to include new faces and lose track of current faces.
My social network is right here in front of me. And it took me forty seven years to build it.
So will I abandon Facebook and LinkedIn and blogging and Twitter?
Well, probably Twitter. But I will keep the rest of them.
But I will try to remember day by day that my real social network is much more valuable than this virtual social network. And should you see me waver in this commitment – please help me by reminding me.
Because I do find these social networking sites very interesting – from an IT perspective. And I do love what I do.
